Why I hate herbal supplements...

On Facebook, awhile back:

Random Friend:  "Can you believe that simple seaweed and its super-nutrients reverse aging, improve sleep quality, decrease appetite and cure cancer?  Contact me today for more information on this super-nutrient pill!"

Me:  "Dude, you can't say that that crap cures cancer.  Sell it for general health if you want, I don't care, but telling people it cures cancer is unethical."

Friend:  "But it's true!  In clinical studies, this chemical kills cancer cells!"

Me:  "Killing cancer cells is not the problem, I can kill cancer cells with a shotgun.  Here's a list of other things which kill cancer:  fire, the toxin of the fugu fish, rabid badger bites that go untreated, Jeanine Garafalo's underarm hair, the One Ring, watching the Justin Bieber movie more than once, Raspberry Zima, not putting the lime in the coconut before drinking them both up, saying Beetlegeuse four times...none of which I'd recommend."

Friend:  "But it's true!  Here's the NIH study:  *lists link*"  (side note:  never trust anyone who links you a NIH study who is not either a researcher or has a least a Master's level science degree).

Me:  "I just read the abstract.  It doesn't say what you think it says."

Friend:  "You're just in league with the pharmaceutical companies to keep the truth from getting out!"

Me:  "When you get cancer, please take only this supplement.  I'll put it on your headstone.  I'm done."

Friend:  "Order yours today!"

See, this is the problem with herbal supplements:  they can imply that they do just about everything, so long as they put the disclaimer "These findings have not been supported by the FDA" at the bottom.  I have also seen people link similar NIH studies as proof that various things such as marijuana and ecstasy "cure cancer." 

#ludicrous