My partner: "how long can you detect cocaine in a patient's system."
Me: "By urine drug screen, about 2-3 days. By hair, up to six months."
Partner: "And ecstasy?"
Me: "Not detected in standard drug tests, but I think our new urine test can detect it. At any rate, you're better off looking for stuff it's cut with, usually heroin or meth/speed. Ecstasy took a big hit after 9/11 because it was brought in primarily by being smuggled by air, so now they make knock-offs and cut it with whatever crap they have lying around that's cheap."
Nurse: "How do you know so much about drugs?"
Me: "When I started medical school I had white hair and tongue and nipple rings."
Nurse: "Well, still that doesn't..."
Me: "My first week of college, I was at a party and a guy did a line of coke off my arm in the middle of a room of about 50 people and no one even paused their conversations to take notice."